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la-zombie-monkey

Pro bono human exotica writer
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Rules:
1. Your OC can't touch the interviewer for whatever reason you choose. (:dummy: Theeyyy won't follow this rule~)
2. You may use multiple OCs but it was created with the idea of one OC.
3. This was created for those who have killed. If they haven't killed, get out.
4. Made to test the reactions of OCs, sorry for being so damn impolite! I really am D:
6. IT IS COMPULSORY TO POST THESE RULES.
7. You don't need to tag, that question may be used for extra SASS from your OC towards the most charming interviewer. xP

   

1. Hey, what's your name?
- Slivin J Cadavore. The rest of my middle name just gets more embarassing.

2. How old are you?
- Twenty two years old.

3. And your gender?
- Mmmmale. I have people who can back me up on that.

4. Fine. What are/were your parents like?
- According to Poppy, I'm practically my mom. And Dad is much nicer without a head on his shoulders.

5. We all need someone to watch our back, is there anyone to take care of you?
- Absolutely. And thank Gah'd I don't have to pay Loon or Jesse to do it.

6. I see...In your opinion, are you a lover or a fighter? Don't say both.
- So far, I'm a fighter.

7. And what do you think people view you as?
- Probably bad for the most part. But I've also got good squishy spots.

8. Talking of lovers, have you got a girl/boyfriend?
- Not at the moment. I've had a couple of both in the last few years.

9. If not, why not? Do you think it's your fault or do you think it's their loss?
- Oh, me and Chiad were bad for each other from the get go. And I had to leave Claud, getting AIDS at fourteen and sharing a hospital bed would have been awful.

10. If you do, what are they like?
- Who now?

11. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Describe your life in one word.
- Listen, it isn't my fault you're bad at wording questions. And...eh, Jayus. *1
Indonesian – "A joke so poorly told and so unfunny that one cannot help but laugh"

12. Do you have a goal in life? In love?
- Retire without any major maiming on my behalf. And a big German man to shag my brains out regularly would be nice too.

13. Ever wanna have kids?
- Eeeh, I was assuming I'd be sterile by the time I was thirty.

14. How would you like to die?
- With a very memorable set of final last words.

15. I'm sure we can arrange it for you soon. What's your favourite weapon?
- I do enjoy explosives, steath and a really good gun. Not in that order.

16. Where do you live?
- I'm either in Barbados in a cottage, or in New Orleans.

17. Sounds awful, how do you manage to live in such a dump?
- Watch your fucking mouth or I will make sure you end up buried under a real one.

18. What's...what's that smell?
- I'm going to hazard a guess that it's the Chinese grocery down the street.

19. It's you. You stink! When was the last time you showered exactly?
- How the hell do you think I smell like fermenting cabbage and Peking duck? And last night.

20. Mhm yeah it shows. ¬_¬
- Wasn't like I was rubbing down a with a racoon sponge, you know.

21. Do you have a theme tune, do you think? Perhaps one your creator found for you?
- "El Tango de Roxanne from Moulin Rouge. *2

22. Do you like it?
- I do. Very fitting. If you swap weapons in for the dress.

23. How do you feel about your creator (don't forget they selected this interview for you)?
- Never seen anything swear that much at work and win over the Newbies at the same time.

24. Ever killed anyone?
- Thought it would have been obvious at this point.

25. Thought as much. I'm impressed. Ever killed a family member? Why?
- Yes. Buuuuut it wasn't my Mom at five. Wasn't like I was running around with a Power Ranger trying to cave skulls in.

26. A friend? Why?
- Haven't got paid enough for it yet.

27. A lover? Why?
- Big difference between owner and lover. I think.

28. A cop or other law enforcer? Yu-huh, I'm not sure I need to ask why here.
- What, you thought I was after employeees at Disney World?
29. And how about yourself? I mean, have you ever considered ending your life? Other than the obvious stupidly pathetic life you lead bringing you down, what else made you consider?
-Nope, I've always been a trooper.

30. And who/what stopped you?

A healthy sense of self esteem?

31. If you had killed yourself, would anyone have felt bad about it? Friends, acquaintances, family, lovers?
- Kurin would probably be up in the air about it, actually....

32. And I suppose you're glad you didn't?
- All I can say is the Near-Death-Experience sex is pretty amaaaazing.

33. Yes, well great. I'd love to say it's been a pleasure talking to you but it really wasn't.
- Ooooh I'm wounded. Don't you have a cooking magazine to buy?

34. You gonna tag any more people to do this so they can feel your pain?
- Mmm Roth Bastow. Might have to get a English to German dictionary, though...

35. Whatever. See ya later (though I really hope not).
- Oh, I already know where you live.



*1
Jayus. Indonesian – "A joke so poorly told and so unfunny that one cannot help but laugh"


*2

www.youtube.com/watch?v=skcvDD…
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Or something like that! Officially turned 21 today so I can buy booze in the States now! Except for the fact I don't drink except for special occasions, which tends to be Christmas, Birthday, or dinners out. (Captain Morgan Spiced Rum and Rootbeer is the way to go, there.)
www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/H… enjoying the hell out of a Emile Henry baking stone I picked up for myself. Killer for pizza, which is actually what I made for breakfast. That and Hazelnut coffee made me a happy girl.

Love Y'all and Thank God my Internet didn't crap out on me again on my birthday.;)
Anywhosits, going out to a dinner with the family, getting a intriging book
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God knows my brain came up with the image of frizzy copper coloured hair with fat wads of gray when I only have twenty or so white hair and the rest is still black, but I think finding them in my comb might have had something to do with it. Nice white, not the thumb of a smoker with a twenty pack a week habit.

Annnd I'm sliding into the second week without a working shower, so I'm just about ready to strip the back wood out, replace it, install the taps and the bath kit back in and take a nice twenty minute shower instead of using the bathroom and kitchen sinks for it.

Finally got through the year and two weeks anniversary of holding down the same job, but it's pissing me off that I can't get more than two day shifts when the bosses are importing assholes from Belgium when they actually admit to not liking their attitude. Time to drag the last resume out of the file folder, update it and start hunting for a second job.

Mind you, I haven't the foggiest what I'm saving this money up for beyond retirement fund and possibly a car.



Still, job hunting is going to suck.
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Checking in with some fairly motherly coworkers on whether Puppies and Bits over rice has a chance of happening in the Philippines. The answer is a resounding yes!


A curiousity streak has been in mind for a while ever since I've gotten more heavily involved with my coworkers, but I'm Canadian and I don't find that it's polite to ask a brash question about whether house pets features in somebody's cuisine. However, Jackie, Dasuel and Sheunghi are all Korean and they don't really have any bones about dog meat being involved in some dishes back home.

My leading line over coffee and a sandwich went somewhere along this:


"Hey Auntie Nymph?"

"Yes?"

"How is Charlie doing?" (From what I've heard, a hell raiser of a very small dog.)

"Wonderful! I love him so much now, much better now that I don't hate him."

"Awesome! Why did you hate him?"

"Wellll, back home we didn't treat dogs like humans. Lots of strays around."  (This is a fair enough point, seeing how most people here are nicer to dogs then fellow human beings.)


"Eheh. You know how they use dog meat occasionally in Korea? Do you guys ever...ehhm, use dog meat back home?"

"Oh, yes yes! I never ate it though."

"So, what was the weirdest meat you've ever eaten?"



And yet I still don't know why I led up to all of that with Nympha's pet dog. :iconohwhyplz: But I've eaten some fairly weird stuff in my life, so I'm not in a position to nit pick. Horse and pig blood stew being in the top five.


On the other hand, I had to microwave some premade rissoto for supper tonight and got hit with this Smell/Taste wave of memory when I pulled it out. You know how ever home has that certain smell to it? Well this stuff smelled/tasted exactly like my best friend's house when we were growing up, and I felt like my Mom needed to be informed. After the initial scoffing, she agreed.


Of course, the next memory was of her mom very sweetly answering my question about the ginger roots hanging from their ceiling whilst laughing her ass off. "No, Jeneil, they're ginger, a 'erb, not voodoo dolls."

Thanks Chantel, you saved me a lot of freaking out.:heart: Finding the pickled human toe in a jar later on did scare me nearly peeless though.


Explanation here ->  www.sourtoecocktailclub.com/


Turns out they were holding on to it for Captain Dick, the next door neighbor.


And Charlie, I created a spicy hot chocolate that demands that you get your lovely backside up and gargle around in it with the bonifide whipped topping with cinnamon and chocolate bare garnish.
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11 Things Meme

6 min read
"Rules:
1. You must post these rules.
2. Each person must post 11 things about themselves in their journal.
3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and create eleven new questions for the people you tag to answer.
4. You have to choose 11 people to tag and post their icons on your journal. (Why eleven? It's such a random number.) Also, you KNOW the rules about tagging. OBEY THEM ADSKJFLAJDLF"


Eleven things you never wanted to know! (Sorry Saraaah, but it's so true in my case!)

1. I never realized a possibly bruised tailbone could be such a pain in the ass until it happened yesterday.

2. I have at least seven books laying around the house, dog eared and whimpering
for me to finish reading them.

3. And five stories I should finish writing.

4. Pretty sure my life would suck if I hadn't found you guys on dA, and I am feeling guilty about all these sentence fragments.

5. Whilst thinking about my characters, I realized I don't feel a stitch of shame over making a seventy five year old grandfather a bit of a slut. (Emaretto knows what I'm talking about.)

6. The stuff I'm never going to use goes in the top drawer of my dresser, and the things I really care about tends to migrate towards my change bowl.

7. Did not have to lie at my annual job review about liking working there.

8. Big biiiiiiiig fan of Post Secrets. Not wild about FML.

9. I worry about staying away from the really nice cigars. I could handle going without booze, cigarettes or other drugs for the rest of my life.

10. Keep waking up with the fuzzy flat sheet on my bed balled up like the favourite teddy bear (a over grown duck) that the dog ate.

11. Oooooh so grumpy over not getting into Poison Ivy's hotel at this point in the game (Arkham City.) And quite pleased with kicking Joker's ass at least once.


~grievousfan's Questions!


1) How long did you wait before finally filling this out??
ASAP, BETCH. Like three hours after you posted yours.

2) If you could have any superpower, which one would you definitely NOT want?
X-Ray Vision off the top of my head.

3) Fame or fortune?
Nnnnnmmm, fortune!

4) What is your stance on caterpillars? (what do you think of them?)
Just about as cute as hedgehogs if they don't spook me. (I know it sounds rather sad considering how slowly they move, but it has happened before.)

5) Do you love me?
Damn straight!:heart:

6) Would you be answering the previous question if it wasn't included in this meme?
With a great deal more fumbling, but I'd answer it.:)

7) If everything tastes like chicken, then what does chicken REALLY taste like?
The taste version of a bland, blank slate. Sorta like tofu, because it soaks up the flavors of the things it's cooked with, rather than having a taste that could stand alone.

8) Are you in college? If so, do you have a dorm or is your ass too broke to afford one?
Nooo, I am not, and my ass is hopefully not broke enough to not afford one.

9) Do you have a boy-/girlfriend? If so, how long have you had him/her?
Nope. First and last one was a while ago. (For the moment, Charlie, don't give me that look!)

10) NASCAR. What are your thoughts?
I don't really know enought to have a solid opinion on it, but I think it's one of those things where you either instantly like it or don't. Like drinking coffee.

11) Do you like the way the deviantART admins are handling the site?
Not wild about it, but I deal with enough assholes at work, so I try not to be one here or in the general public.


My Questions!

1. If you had to only pick one for the rest of your life, would you rather have music, books, or movies?

2. Hockey! What the sweet hell do you think it consists of?

3. Would you ever like to meet your parents back when they were your age?

4. Best thing in your life right now?

5. Would you ever put up with somebody smuggling veggies into something that doesn't usually have them in the first place? Shredded beets in chocolate cake if you're lost for an example.

6. Show me the Cheesiest/Raunchiest/Funniest pick up line you dare type? Go forth and research for one if you must. ;)

7. Current obession and pet peeve of yours at the moment?

8. You dreading coming up with eleven people to tag with this thing too?

9. Do you like Web Comics? If so, what's your favourite top three? (If you don't, favourite three movies.)

10. What would your perfect cookie have in it?

11. Do you miss being in High School? (And all the questions that had 'And explain why.' stapled on the end?)

TAG!

:iconemaretto: :iconcharlieboythe1st: :iconliobi: :iconclickmon: :iconlemontie: :icondi-flores: :iconsosweet-thatit-hurts: :iconnothingspecial16: :iconvert-is-ninja: (Endlessly hopeful.;)) :iconartbyzephra: :iconinuryan:
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